A thank you to my husband

Thank you for the work you’ve done towards our experiment, thank you for being a wonderful husband, a fantastic father and a sexy lover. Thank you for always standing by me. Thank you for loving me despite how much you feel you have to nag me.

Thank you for not beating me with a big stick when I can’t sleep at night, for not leaving me when I’ve been at my whiniest and most annoying, for not reporting me to social services when it’s got to 2pm and our kids still aren’t fed and dressed, for when the temptation has been to drive me to a secluded spot & leave me there but you didn’t. For all those things and for so much more. Thank you.

 

A glimpse at the year gone by

 

A year of change.

2011 has been one hell of a year for us. Some things need to be forgotten, others need to remain at the front of our minds and others need developing.

We spent a total of 27 nights under canvas, attended 5 festivals, began new journeys, met new friends, embraced our not so usual lifestyle and generally came out of the year with a better understanding of who we are and where we’d like to be.

I felted, I sewed, I attempted (again) crochet. I learnt a lot about the Egyptians, about pond life, about armour & castles. I pursued my interest in things witchy.

We rockpooled, we pond dipped, we explored the woods. We identified plants, trees, and herbs. We saw rainbows and planets and even a meteor shower.

These are the things I hold dear, these are the things I hold on to.

I cried, I hid, I fought. We cried, we worried, we thought hard. We suffered loss, ill health, surgery.

These are the things we got through, but don’t want to repeat.

Our friendships suffered this year, our relationships with others have taken a beating but we are strong and the coming year will be better. We will renew our friendships, communicate.

 

Embalming, bombing, & invasion of the giant pigs!

This morning has been a busy morning. We ate a paleo breakfast; fruit, nuts & seeds. We embalmed an orange – lots of squelchy scooping out of insides & a bit of gagging from Boo (from the child who carefully examines raw fish heads!), and finally the sprinkling/smothering of salt.

Then it was time for the making of bath bombs… At the wonderful HESFES we bought a bathbomb kit which included all we needed – all things I have at home but with pots & pipettes & scoops , making it a ‘proper’ science kit and totally refillable. Yogi scooped & poured, shook & jiggled then spooned & squashed; then it was Boos turn. We now have a lovely smelling craft room with drying bathbombs.

Now Boo is happily staging the invasion of the giant pigs in our living room! An elderly friend has been encouraging our girls in the collection of squeaky rubber pigs and today Boo decided she’d build a train track for them to invade. I think it’s unconnected to the current goings in England, more likely connected to the cows that got out and misbehaved on the road in front of us as we travelled through the Ashdown Forest!

All of this and it’s only 11.20, at least there’s no fighting – although of course now I’ve jinxed it.

 

Escape

I think I need to get back to basics with Boo. Remove a lot of external stimulus and try to instil some calm. I’m going to try some dietary exclusions and most likely a huge cull on what we have in the home. Although we have much less than many I still think that maybe back to almost nothing with a gradual introduction of basics is a good idea. I want her to want the outdoors – she loves it when we are away but our garden is so uninspiring for her, I need to find a way to live our days in the woods I think.

 

Mind jars & calm

Lots of ideas floating through my head on how to calm an unruly Boo. I don’t want to stifle her, I love her creativity & enthusiasm but sometimes her exuberance it’s excessive and ends in tears – hers, her sisters, others that she’s playing with & mine at times. Via Pinterest which then linked to this blog http://stilllifewithcircles.blogspot.com/2011/04/meditating-with-childrens.html I found ‘mind jars’ for meditating with children. I’m trying it right now as something to distract Boo. It seems to have worked in that it took her away from the situation, gave her something to focus on and a specific timeframe – the time it took for the glitter to settle. Ours hasn’t worked in quite the same way as our glitter settled split between the top & bottom, but that’s ok once the glitter stopped floating she was calm and went off to play with no need for further tears.

 

Silent Sunday

 

Silent Sunday

 

Not enough blogging too much tweeting!

Arse! Laptop screen is broken so phone blogging is all I’m going to manage for the foreseeable future. Also spent far more time tweeting & not thinking of blogging – due to laptop & time deficit.

Noise is home, not in an ideal kind of way – no homelife participation happening but at least we know where she is at night, and that (for the most part) she’s sober… She’s now started her new meds which (we hope) will help things along in a positive kind of direction. She’s agreed to be registered as ‘educated otherwise’ which is a big fat smiley, as she’s going to spend a minimum of 12 hours a week at home reading, researching & feedingback. She’s started helping at Yogis nursery one morning a week on a voluntary basis – so all is moving in a forward direction rather than a backward one! Yay for some positivity in our house – is this the affirmations paying off?

Ed’s now home ed, she deregistered from school Friday and so far is having a fantastic time. We’ve bought an AQA GCSE maths book and she’s keen to follow her heart with the rest of her learning! Maths book was her choice & it might well be the one GCSE she does – still haven’t told her dad about the change in arrangements but if he wanted a say in it all he really ought to give a stuff the rest of the time.

Boo’s steaming ahead (steam being my new favourite word thanks to a lovely day out with Earthenwitch & her little lovely) with her reading, her everything! She’s starting to read – with very little input, she’s building, letting everyone we meet know just what it is the Egyptians were up to way back in the days of pyramids & pharaohs, and of course – that key word…. socialising

Yogi’s loving having having Ed home, there shouldn’t be favourites but they are each others and I love it because it means they have their own special person that isn’t me (as well as me if course because I am everybody’s favourite! )

 

Attempting a post via iPhone!

The #30dayplan is progressing, in as much as I’m getting through the 30 days. It doesn’t feel as though I’m achieving much although I am eating more regularly/properly – not actually regularly or properly just moreso than before.
Separate to that, or in conjunction or whatever, each feeds/impacts the other I guess, I’m really struggling with the teen parenting thing. My fairly reliable eldest has completely flipped, she’s withdrawn from college, she’s never at home/I never know where she is or when she might be home, she’s rude/gives us attitude. I know all of this is to be expected but she’s been so much better than a stereotypical teen up to now I thought we’d missed it. I’m kind of making light if it here but actually it’s really tough and most definitely my toughest parenting challenge to date, and I’ve got 3 more teenage girls to live through yet! I even thought today that if I got a ‘do over’ I’d skip the children bit. I’m not giving up or anything like that but it really does feel like my heart is breaking.

On a more positive note we headed to the Forest Row Home Ed meet up today (Boo, Yogi & me) and had a lovely time. We met some new families, did more felting, I love how much the children (and the adults) have grabbed this activity and hung on to it. There’s some beautiful pieces coming out of the sessions, I just wish I could remember to take pics, will attempt to just that when we meet up next month.
Ah and in the most exciting news of all we just spent our first weekend in our Belltent, twas wonderful, absolutely wonderful. I felt completely at peace laid or sat on our bed in there. The stove kept us toasty on the second night – as it was our first time we had to assemble & fit the flue kit this time and as we arrived late Friday night we decided not to do it then. We ended with 4 of us in one bed for most of the night (dad, mum, Ed & Yogi) with Boo joining us shortly before daybreak. That in itself was pretty lovely actually. It’s nice to feel Ed still needs me even if Noise doesn’t want to need me anymore.